Fun and Pleasure are two essential ingredients for a fulfilling relationship. One of the main issues for couples in a long-term relationship is when FUN disappears and routine sets in. Keeping fun alive and constantly seeking out and experimenting with new things/ideas/concepts, keeps us on our toes and boredom at bay. I love to see elderly couples still with a twinkle in their eyes, able to surprise each other after so many years together. Joyous! Something to emulate!
Of course, modern societal pressures and/or children make spontaneity challenging, although not impossible. It merely requires us to be conscious and present in our relationships as much as possible, adding a little thought and effort into it, to enjoy a thoroughly fulfilling life in a long-term relationship. This enhances EVERY area of our life with our chosen partner, in and out of the bedroom … yes I did say that!
We don’t mean to let fun slide; we don’t mean to become lazy, yet in most couples I see, routine has taken over from fun and real, deep, true, communication has broken down, hence they seek my guidance. Sometimes, they truly don’t know one another as much as they thought they did! Gentlemen, I’m your guide now, as I’ve been guiding Ladies for a few years!
Some couples only need a fresh perspective to bring fun back, others have much deeper issues requiring specialist professional assistance. As long as both are open, ready and willing to turn things around, it can be achieved. Then there are times when a couple have grown so far apart, realising their relationship is at an end. In those cases, the aim is to navigate those separations, making them as amicable as possible.
With a little imagination, a dash of negotiation and a degree of compromise, here are four ideas to get you started …
1. Love Languages: I highly recommend Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages, so simple, yet life-changing! When you know and understand your own and your partner’s primary Love Language, life becomes easy and fun. The Love Languages are: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, Physical Touch. We all have one or possibly two dominant Love Languages, although all do indeed come into play in varying degrees. When I was first introduced to this some years ago, I could see every family member in their dominant LL, and play to it!
2. Partner Dance: One of my personal favourites as a partner dancer since childhood! Once dancing Jive/Ceroc but since 2003, Salsa/Latin have been and continue to be my passion followed by Tango. I’ve even worked in the industry and danced with the best of the best from around the world at our International Weekenders. Partner dance is something to enjoy and have fun with, building confidence, co-operation and acceptance of role, creating magic to music. There is nothing more sensual than taking dance lessons and then dancing a routine with your own life-partner. My top recommendation would be to attend a full Dance Weekender to sample every type of Dance before deciding on which one you and your partner would prefer to learn together on a regular basis.
3. Date Nights: My friends with children impress me by honouring each other, placing Date Nights as priority in their hectic lives and sticking to these special pre-planned evenings together. They really look forward to some conscious quality time away from daily routines. Get super creative here. Reconnect and share your innermost desires with your partner, we all grow at different rates and find that we crave new or different things from those that we once enjoyed. This is natural and we must feel free to express our new desires without fear of judgement, rejection, shame or ridicule. Dress to Impress, it will make you feel all the more Sensual! But more importantly, it shows a reverence for your relationship, however long you have been together. I challenge you to leave your phones at home too; no distractions!
4. Revamp Your Bedroom: Oh là là! I’m going there! Turn your Bedroom into your BOUDOIR; this is an absolute MUST, having inspired many women to take immediate action, Men have also been inspired! Sumptuous bedding, throws, pillows, cushions, fairy lights or mood lighting, candles, flowers, diffuser for Essential Oils. And a special cupboard for intimate toys, oils etc! Declutter your entire Bedroom, rearrange it, change the furniture or furnishings if necessary, remove all technology (Bedrooms are for rest and FUN!) and if you have children, secure a lock on your door! A Sumptuous Boudoir aids restful sleep too … trust me, I know this!
These are only a sample of what is available to you, if you’d like to learn more, please drop me a line. Have Fun!
Rachel is an International Relationship Mentor and Guide, primarily assisting Males, having worked closely with Females for a number of years. Also now working with couples. If you’d like to know how she can help you, please take advantage of her 90 min Discovery Session to determine if working together is right for you and Rachel. Contact her on 07786 912 355 or book a time slot here https://calendly.com/houseoffeminine